A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about the importance of spending time together. Today, I want to talk about how important touch is to a relationship. When I say touch, I mean holding hands, hugging, rubbing your partners shoulders, etc. I mean kissing, both quickly and at length. I mean sex.
Quick touches are a way to stay connected; to remind yourselves that you are partners in an intimate relationship, not just roommates or friends. It is a way to reconnect after a long day, when the chaos is still swirling around you: dinner, kids, working from home, email. A kiss when you walk in the door. A touch on the back as you pass. Holding hands while watching television.
Sex, when it is without resentment or anger, is a way to build the intimacy even more: to be vulnerable, to connect on a purely physical and emotional level. Sexuality is a basic human need. It is important to us as humans. It is important to us as partners in a relationship.
I regularly assign homework to the couples that I see that involves touch: Touch each other. Be physical together. Don’t let life, chaos and resentment interfere with that aspect of your relationship. Let go. Let go with each other.
Touch is a powerful thing. It is healing. It is a way to reconnect.